The other day I went to a local production of ‘Les Miserables” with Shauna the lady that I’m dating. She went to the ladies room and was gone for what I thought was a long time. I thought it must be a long line in the ladies room. It turned out that she got locked in the bathroom stall and was unable to get out for awhile. She turned the lock the wrong way and only “thought” that she was locked in the stall. Her first question to me when she got back was “weren’t you going to come and find out what happened to me”. I said, “Sure in about 5 more minutes.” Really I would never go into a ladies bathroom at all unless it was totally by mistake which I did once the La Jolla Von’s Store. I was in a big hurry and didn’t look at the sign on the door. I wouldn’t go into a ladies bathroom on purpose. I don’t want to get arrested and then Shauna might be upset that there was no way to get home. It was a touchy situation but next time if she’s not back soon I’ll go to the ladies bathroom door and yell out her name. That could also be embarrassing and humiliating if it’s just a long line in the ladies room. It’s tough to know what to do but with women but as my dad used to say, “you can’t live with them and you can’t kill them”…

I have a bad habit that I consider rude about myself but I seem to do it anyway. I write out my “to do list” in church. The pastor doesn’t seem to mind. I’m sure that he thinks I’m taking notes on his interesting sermon topic. Most of the time though I find nothing interesting in his sermon and I don’t want to waste my time just sitting there doing nothing. I do half listen to the sermon so I am getting something out of it. Do you think that I will go to Hell for this? I do have going to church on my list so I get to check it off once the sermon is over and I am in fact there. Woody Allen says that 80% of success is showing up or was it 90%. Is Woody Allen a good role model for spiritual virtue? Maybe I need to honest with the pastor and tell him that his sermons are boring. Nah, I think that I’ll just continue to appear to be taking notes.

I don’t know if you have noticed lately all the men around who are dying their hair. Back in the 50s and 60s when I was growing up that was strictly a “woman thing.” Men back then would be thought of as “sissies" if they dyed their hair. Now it’s very common and not just in the gay community. I think it all started when Ronald Reagan was President. He must have dyed his hair but he was an actor. He was acting being President of the United States. It was ok for him to do it. I am going gray but I refuse to dye my hair. My “hair stylist” that I like to call my “barber” says that with my color of hair it would probably turn yellow if I did dyed it anyway…

Even now I’m thinking that I should be further along in my life. Some great people in history were dead by the time they were my age. Even now I seem to be following my heart and sometimes it takes me into a brick wall and I get a bloody nose. Even now I seem to be floating along in life, drifting along mile after mile on the river of life seeing life floating by on the bank and hoping most of the time not to stop. Even now I feel blessed that my life has gone pretty well but shouldn’t it be better. Even now I seem to be going along the road of life and wondering when will I get a flat tire or have my car break down. Even now I wonder when I will take a writing workshop that has more men in it. Even now I wonder when I will take a writing workshop when the women will think what an interesting man. He seems way to manly/studdly to be in a writing workshop.

Have you ever preheated the oven to cook your frozen cheese enchiladas and then realized 45 minutes later that your dinner is not done. You have to put the enchiladas in the oven and YOU FORGOT. You feel embarrassed and very insecure about your sanity. At that moment you’re glad that you live alone but wonder if you did have a roommate would they have enough confidence to tell you that you are wasting electricity preheating an empty oven…