Wednesday, February 15, 2006

15 Minutes of Fame with Ellen

I woke up the other day and realized that I haven’t had my 15 minutes of fame. That of course is the 15 minutes of fame that Andy Warhol promised everyone. I haven’t even had 5 minutes of fame. I’m 55 and my father only lived to be 56 so I better get going. I decided to start a petition to be on the Ellen Show. I have been doing standup comedy for the past 10 years and feel it’s time to take my comedy to the next level. I like Ellen’s show and tape it every day. I don’t like to drive in L.A. traffic so I thought it would be nice if Ellen brought her show to San Diego. That’s part of the petition. So far I have 18 signatures…

Monday, February 13, 2006

Blogging

I have been blogging now for about a month. I would have started sooner but I forgot my first pass word. Being the self centered egocentric person that I am I thought millions of people would be clamoring to hear what I thought about numerous topics. I thought that the White House would probably call to hear my ideas about the Iraq, Iran, or North Korea. I thought Dr. Phil would want to know my thoughts on relationships. What about the local news people to find out about the weather. So far not one call, not even a comment. Oh well it makes me feel important at work to tell my friends. I’m a BLOGGER.

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

“Go Veggie”

I have been a vegetarian for years. I like being a bit unique and different. My motto for years has been “go veggie”. I sometimes yell it out in supermarkets to shock people. I had a dream the other night that I yelled out “go veggie” in the Von’s Meat Dept. The head butcher got mad and came at me with a big knife and said “not in my meat dept.—pal”. “Take your commie-pinko themes over to the vegetable area.” He was a mean guy. I read in one vegetarian book that many butchers go mad or have health problems after years of cutting up cattle. It’s bad karma. Maybe that is a vegetarian urban legend.