Dear Tom,

You have asked me several times about my philosophy of getting along with women so I decided that rather than tell you I would put it in writing. I know that you have struggled in your relationships with women and have never been married. I on the other hand was married and struggled with that. Why did you ask me anyway? Are you on drugs? Oh yeah that’s right.
Here are my thoughts but I am don’t consider myself an expert. In fact most of the time I have “no clue” on getting along with women but here’s what I think today:
A. Women are different from us more emotional therefore they like it when we are nice.
1. If you are too nice they don’t like it because they think you are being phony.
2. If you are phony they don’t like it because if reminds them of their fathers.
3. If you remind them of their father you will never have sex with them because that would be incest.
Tom remember be nice but not too nice…
Women like to laugh and have a good time. Girls just want to have fun as Cindy Lauper used to always say.
1. They like to laugh but sometimes they like to cry and talk about serious things and get their emotions out.
2. Remember Tom don’t be to funny or to serious.

Your Friend,

Jim

P.S. Shred this letter once you read it so no one will ever see this stuff!!!